Should The First Time Hurt?
The first time you have sex can be pretty intense and stressful: you may feel tense or uncomfortable which is perfectly normal. Find out what’s going on in your body—and in your head—during your first time.
First sexual intercourse can sometimes be a bit painful. If a girl feels stressed, the muscles of her vagina contract, which makes penetration more difficult. And stress is also bad for arousal: then there might not be enough vaginal lubrication, which can make penetration uncomfortable.
Ultimately, if you’ve never experienced full vaginal penetration, the hymen – a small membrane located at the vaginal opening – is tight. Depending on the shape of their hymen, some girls won’t feel anything, others may feel slight discomfort, and some may feel more or may bleed a little.
Your hymen might already be dilated if you play various sports, use tampons, or masturbate.
What if my first time sex isn’t that great?
Did something not live up to your expectations, so you’re disappointed? Is a misunderstanding making you uncomfortable, angry, or sad? That happens, and there really aren’t a million ways to deal with this kind of situation: you have to talk about it with your partner. Desires, tastes, expectations, moods, limits, methods of protection, fears… you can discuss everything! If you find it embarrassing, use humour to lighten things up.
