Get to know yourself

Getting to know yourself can take a long time. It’s often through life experiences and interactions that some of our personality traits are defined, and how we learn to set boundaries, and determine our needs in different situations.

Here is a little exercise you can do to get to know yourself better. 😊

Try to name...

• 3 things that make you unique and special 🙆🏾
• 3 things you’re good at 👍
• 3 things you like 🏂 🎧 🚴 🎹 ⚽ 🎬 💄 📷
• 3 dreams and/or aspirations for your future 💭

Knowing yourself will allow you to:

•   choose better friends, lovers, teammates
•   respect differing opinions
•   not feel attacked so easily or question yourself constantly
•   be able to express your feelings, needs and wishes more easily
•   make choices that respect your values and allow you to own them
•   assert yourself and claim your place

Focus on what makes you proud

To keep your self-esteem strong, you can write down what makes you feel proud in a journal. It doesn't have to be anything extraordinary! It can be speaking in front of a group when you’re feeling shy, trying a new activity, managing a situation well, or acting on something despite any fears or doubts. The important thing is to have a positive view of yourself by focusing on your qualities, strengths, talents, and successes. When you’re going through a difficult time, reread your journal to remember your successes! That will give you a good dose of positive energy.

Set realistic goals for yourself

It's easier to climb stairs one step at a time than all at once! Every step you take is an accomplishment in itself. By setting realistic goals, you’ll feel proud of yourself, which will help you to keep going.

A realistic goal is an attainable challenge. It takes into account your energy levels, your skills, and the time that you can devote to your project.

For example, talking to someone you’re interested in for the first time may seem difficult. To make it easier, you can break this challenge down into several steps.

•   Start by smiling or looking at them when you pass them in a hallway.
•   Challenge yourself to say hello.
•   Find an opportunity to talk to them, for example by asking them a question.
•   And so on!

No matter how the person reacts, each step takes courage, and you can be proud to have taken it. Plus, you're learning; you’re finding out what works well and what you can do better next time. All of this adds to your self-confidence.

No matter the results, be proud of what you’ve accomplished. It’ll make you want to take on other challenges!

Learn to rely on your loved ones

Remember that your family and friends are there during tough times. When you doubt yourself, are going through a difficult time, or need encouragement, you can turn to your family and friends. The people you are close to know you very well and can help you remember your successes, strengths, good qualities, and abilities. Who do you feel close to? It could be your father, mother, brother, sister, other family members, friends, a teacher, a counsellor. When you feel that your self-confidence is shaken, turn to them, they’ll help you feel better.

Learn from your mistakes

You can learn from your mistakes by learning to recognize and accept them. You’ll become more mature and humble; being filled with pride is often what stops people from apologizing. Instead of looking at your mistakes as failures, look at them as opportunities to learn, even though this may be hard to swallow at first.

When you’re faced with a difficulty, don’t lose hope. Each challenge helps you develop a little more resistance and courage.

If you experience a failure, ask yourself how you can use it to learn and do better the next time. Failure is rarely pleasant but remember that you can learn something positive from it.

Accept what makes you different

Your differences are what make you an incredible person. If everyone was the same, no one would stand out from the crowd. You wouldn't be able to choose or love one person more than another, to have a romantic relationship, or experience friendship. How are you different from others? What makes you unique, special?

Being proud of what makes you different will give you a lot of strength.