How to help my teenager deal with bullying
Bullying is a serious problem that affects many teenagers. As a parent, it is normal to feel worried about this situation. It is important to remember that every teenager experiences bullying differently and that our role is to support them through this ordeal.
To remember
👉 Show your teenager that you are there to listen and that their emotions are legitimate.
👉 Help your teen identify what they can control in this situation, encourage dialogue, and explore solutions.
One of the first things to do is to help your teenager identify what they can control in this situation. Encourage them to talk about what they are going through and to express their emotions. Remind them that they are not alone and that by speaking out, they are taking back power from the bully.
Help your teenager find concrete solutions to deal with bullying. For example, learning to be assertive, ignoring the bully, or asking a trusted adult for help.
Validate their emotions and support them
If your teenager doesn't want to go to school anymore because of bullying, it is essential to validate their emotions. Tell them that you understand how they feel and that it's normal to be scared or sad. Offer them a space to listen and comfort them.
Collaborate with the school
Once your teenager feels ready, you can consider contacting the school together: by law, every school must have a bullying prevention plan. By informing school staff of the situation, you are allowing them to be proactive, to put in place measures to stop the bullying and support your child.
Make sure you have their consent before contacting the school, however, if their safety is at stake, you will need to explain why you have no choice but to report the situation.
When to intervene?
It is important to find a balance between supporting your teenager and their autonomy. Encourage them to manage the situation on their own, but don't hesitate to intervene if you feel that their safety, development or mental health is in danger.
What to do if your child is the bully?
If you find out that your teenager is bullying others, try to understand the reasons why they are acting this way. Is it to be accepted by a group? To feel powerful?
Once you understand their motivations, you can help them find other ways to achieve their goals. Encourage them to develop their empathy and resolve conflicts peacefully.
Communication, a valuable tool
Always keep the dialogue open with your teenager: be interested in their school life, their friends and their activities. The stronger your bond, the more likely they will be to confide in you if needed.
Finally, remember that every situation is unique. There is no magic solution to bullying. The most important thing is to listen to your teenager, support them and help them find the resources they need to overcome this ordeal.
